Beginning Again (Kendall/Luke)

As they pulled away, she was screaming in her mind. This was so scary, but fun and exciting. She held on tight to him, even if it was just a five minute drive to anyone's house from her studio, that is unless you were the Salvatore's. As he parked the bike and got off, she swung her leg around to where the other one was. She took the hand he extended and stood up, carrying her two bags and medium stack of papers. She really needed to do these before anything else.

I smile and take the bags out of her hand. I unlock the front door and step aside to let her in. She walks in and I close the door behind us. I set her bags down on the couch and pour two glasses of Jack. I sit on the couch and hand her one. Stupid paperwork. I'll help her if she wants. Paperwork's always fun. I smirk and take a sip of my drink.

She followed him in as he let her into his home. She walked into some office looking place. She set the papers on the desk and grabbed a pen, sitting in the chair where a person like a boss or busniessman or woman would sit. She took the glass of jack he offered her. She loved Jack. "Tell me about it." she began to fill in different blanks in the papers, asking names, ages and different unneeded information and such. "How can I spend forever with you if I'm like this?" she asked him, out of the blue and focused on both topics, of her question and all the papers for her next showcase.

I swallow. Mood ruined. I run a hand through my hair. I don't know. I down the rest of my drink. That's one thing I'm trying hard not to think about right now. I look at her as she writes. I don't want to lose her, but it's not fair to her if she grows old and I look 24 for the rest of my life. It's not fair for her. It's not fair for me. I love her too much to let her go, but then again, if I love her, I should let her go. Isn't that how the saying goes?

"You cant tell me this hasnt passed your mind before, now can you? Do you think that when im an old woman you'll still be in love with me? All wrinkly and white haired, needing to be catered to like an infant?" that was another topic she wanted to talk about. Was it even possible for Hybrids to have children? Sure they were wolf and vamp, but couldnt it be possible for them to continue with the wolf gene? She continued to write down on the papers, two out of fifty were done. "Did you ever think I was going to ask you one day?"

I look her dead in the eye. We both know I don't give a shit what you look like. You know I'd love you through it. I'd care for you through it. I'm not shallow. I take another sip of my drink. Of course I figured you'd ask me about it. I just didn't think it'd be now, Kendall. I shake my head. The thought of losing you kills me, Kendall. I already lost you once; I'm not going to do that again.

"Lost me once? No you didnt lose me, you gave me up and tossed me away like some piece of trash. then all of a sudden you decied to turn your entire life around just because I cant get over the fact that you were married? No 24 year old would want to be with an 80 year old, unless you were a playmate. But thats not what I'm talking about. If I stay human, You wont have me forever. Do you even know if Hybrids can change people, or do I have to find a vampire to change me? Maybe Elizabeth Salvatore wouldnt mind a few ounces of blood to give me what I want." she said, rasing her voice slightly from her calm demenor. She doesnt really like to yell, so this was all the higher her voice would go.

I grit my teeth and manage to keep a calm voice. I did not throw you away. I'm so terribly sorry that I thought you were dead. My mistake. I turned my life around because I found you again, and I realized that I couldn't keep living the lie that I was living. I never fell out of love with you. I look her dead in the eye and relax back into the couch. Hybrid can turn humans. I pause for a moment. You need to be sure that's what you want. I know for a fact that I want to be with you forever, but you need to be sure that this is the life you want. You need to be sure you want to live forever. Let alone with me. I meet her gaze. It's no secret that deep down I have confidence issues regarding my love life. Well it is, but Kendall knows about my issues It's hard for me to believe that anyone would want to spend an eternity with me.

"You should have known it wasnt real, Lucas. Why would i show up out of the blue dead without reason? I dont know many people in town and I am the picture or perfect health. Yes i do blame myself for not telling you before hand, but i wanted it to be a suprise. Sorry for trying to be a fun, exciting and all around good girlfriend!" she said, using the same tone of voice. "I wouldnt be telling you i wanted to be with you forever and always if I hadnt meant it. Im willing to deal with the fact that drinking blood is my only way of living. But that also means I can live the most happiest life by spending it with you. If I hadnt felt the same way about you during the wedding or after the wedding, i would never have stayed. I would have been on the next plane to Chicago. I want to be with you, but your last staements are making me reconsider my actions." she told him, getting pissed off at herself, but not allowing it to show.

My eyes flash. She may have a calm exterior but her eyes are burning with anger. She can't hide her emotions from me. I know her better than anyone does. Of course I should've known, Kendall. My voice grows quiet. I stare at the wall. I was compelled. I didn't have a choice. They compelled me to believe you were dead and I didn't have a choice but to follow their commands. You may not know anyone but I do. I know plenty of people that would love to hurt me. They know the way to hurt me is to hurt you. They know that I love you. I meet her eyes and swallow the guilt down. I feel awful for being the reason that she's in danger. It took me forever to fight the compulsion. I love you, Kendall. I swallow. I love you so incredibly much, it scares me. Every feeling I have is heightened. Every touch. I meet her eyes. You are my everything. I shake my head. I can't live without you, and I don't want to. I look at her and let the emotions flood into my face. Pure love just floods in my face. I want to spend every day of my eternity with you. If that's what you want too, then I couldn't be happier to share that with you. I love you, Kendall. I look at her.